The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
