problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
