I can text with my tongue
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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