it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
