yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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