Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize