GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
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