I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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