TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
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