I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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