Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
