Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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