Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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