what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
