How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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