i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
