Tell her she can't have a vagina
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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