We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
