I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
