She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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