Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Randomize