Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
