I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize
