you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize