It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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