Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
