I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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