Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out