they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
