He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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