So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
