All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
