I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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