i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
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