I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I hate all girls vehemently.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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