grandma shit on top of the toilet
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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