Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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