she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
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i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
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It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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