Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
