Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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