He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I woke up under a house in Key West
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