I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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