he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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