Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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