woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize