Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
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Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
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She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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