i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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