we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
