If i come over, it means nothing
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Randomize