Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
